Fuck my life.

[International Bastard]

Just a couple hours ago:
Some things were getting me stressed out so i went to the library, thinking i can get some peace and quiet and read a little.
Totally zoned out enjoyng my book i hear a woman scream "stop hitting me" I go over there thinking i'd find some big ape, it was a tiny, skinny asian dude in glasses, i pull him away and he says "but she hit me first look at this bruise" Fuck my/his/her life.

[Foxhole]

Wow....abusive little Asian man.

Wait, that's not a metaphor is it?

[International Bastard]

No it's literal. What could abusive little Asian man be a methaphor for though?

[Shiny]

My guess it could be pent up frustration!

FML.

[Foxhole]

A white guy once told me he called his penis an Asian man because his penis was the same size as an Asian man. Take that at face value. I of course, thought he was lying.

"Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML"

[Apathy Wind]

Oh domestic violence - how you've pervaded every aspect of my life

[Foxhole]

Shiny, this one is specially for you. It's posted with all my love.

"Today, my parents decided they won't pay for college because of a Fox News story that said higher education "makes you liberal." FML"

[Kyo-wa]

Ouch, I'm a little hurt, I like Hello Kitty. Though I can't say I'd ever want a Hello Kitty themed anything. Though you might catch a Hello Kitty plush somewhere....

http://weddingbellsblog.com/tag/hello-kitty/
I do love Hello Kitty but even I think hello-kitty themed wedding is like WAY OVER THE TOP!!!111
As long as you do not own a room full of Hello Kitty related stuffs, you are kewl.
Just wondering.. do you by any chance... own a Hello KItty iPhone cover? =D

"Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML"

OUCH!

[Foxhole]

I have a Hello Kitty Toaster. It toasts Hello Kitty's face on every piece of bread I can eat. I haven't even used it yet.

That aside, I do have a modest collection of stuffed animals.

"Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML"

[Shiny]

I wonder what part of the nation that FML about the 'higher education' situation was from..I'm going to say Mississippi. It sounds like something someone with only 4 teeth in their head would say. Or, it could be my homestate...

[Foxhole]

I wonder what part of the nation that FML about the 'higher education' situation was from..I'm going to say Mississippi. It sounds like something someone with only 4 teeth in their head would say. Or, it could be my homestate...

The latter is right on the money. That FML was from North Carolina!

Now a little bit of harsh truth!

"Today, I asked my girlfriend why she can't treat me like the way I treat her. She said, "because you love me more than I love you." FML"

[0style]

i'm totally disappointed with this thread. If I wanted to read FML i'd go to FML's site. Where are Oro's FMLs?

[Foxhole]

I don't have any.

It's all sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows.

In fact, I have over a thousand posts here at this site.

http://www.lmylife.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I just didn't want to share because you'd all be jealous.

[hebretto]

Call me jealous :x

[Foxhole]

You see? That's why I didn't want to mention it!